Baptism, mercy, forgiveness, and nonviolence

The Christian practice of nonviolence begins with forgiveness—not with one person's forgiveness of another, but with the prior forgiveness of the person by God. Baptism signifies that the Christian's new life begins with an awareness of having been himself or herself forgiven: "The Lord has forgiven you; now you must do the same."
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But if no one will forgive, then human beings have no recourse but to a shame/revenge mechanism. Here, people are defined by what they have done, or by what other people have done in their name. They may even be defined by what has been done to them, as when a raped woman is considered to be "spoilt property," to have been "shamed"and so to have "brought shame on" her family. A society that uses shame rather than guilt as a regulating device usually believes also in fate, which, as we have seen, Christianity rejects. Instead Christianity advocates forgiveness, which enables human beings to feel guilt rather than shame for the wrong they have done—guilt being preferable to shame precisely because guilt, unlike shame, can be forgiven. Revenge, which is indispensable for the recuperation of honour after its loss through shame, can be renounced if guilt replaces shame. This is the meaning of Christ's difficult demands that his followers "turn the other cheek" rather than strike back, and forgive others over and over again. But forgiveness is possible only when people feel that they themselves have received mercy. Mercy "in the beginning," from God, is a further meaning of baptism.

—Margaret Visser, The Geometry of Love

Comments

[Antony]

That's good stuff. Thank for posting it.

[Goldberry]

This is great. She clarifies the relationship between shame and guilt in a way I hadn't thought of it. I had focused on the difference between religions and societies which operate on the "merit"-shame + revenge premise, and those that offer the possibility of forgiveness and reconciliation. It's very interesting to me that both Judaism and Islam, as well as secular humanism, have a tradition of revenge. I'm certain that this is what is fueling the rage in the Middle East, and preventing any compromise. In this kind of worldview, giving up anything you believe to be your right is shameful...

Also, I wonder how long the United States (I'm a US citizen) could continue to be an advocate of reconciliation and peace, since we seem to be tearing away quickly from the roots of mercy and forgiveness. I believe that conversion of heart is the only way to peace.

[Sylvia]

Hello Goldberry. Those are good thoughts. Christianity does seem to have a unique message, one which rejects honour in favour of love. I personally think that Judaism and humanism are at least half way there with their concepts of proportional justice tempering the human inclination to revenge (an eye for an eye instead of a head for an eye). It's only Christianity that (in theory) goes all the way and yields, even to the point of death, rather than return evil for evil.